Monterey Peninsula Light Bulb Jokes

How many Monterey residents does it take to change a light bulb?
You can't change light bulbs in Monterey. They must be restored to maintain their historic character.
How many Pacific Grove residents does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but the whole town celebrates the event by crowning a new princess and launching fireworks. Well, they used to, anyway.
How many Carmel residents does it take to change a light bulb?
One, if the bulb is being replaced with another identical bulb. Everyone in town if the bulb is being replaced by a new type. The process requires initial approval from the Planning Commission and City Council which will determine if the new bulb has the allowable wattage, color temperature, materials, and does not involve any technology developed since the Truman administration. If these steps are successful, objecting neighbors will sue the lamp owner, or seek to have the matter put on the ballot. Letters to the editor will be published in the Pine Cone both for and against the new bulb. Meanwhile, the lamp owner, waiting in the dark with piles of legal bills, gives up and moves to North Carolina.
How many Carmel Valley residents does it take to change a light bulb?
One who checks the cabinet and realizes he needs to buy more bulbs. He goes down to Safeway, stops in the produce section to chat with his friend Ed, then forgets why he went there in the first place.
How many Pebble Beach residents does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they hire someone from Seaside to do it for them.
How many Seaside residents does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they can't afford new bulbs.
How many Sand City residents does it take to change a light bulb?
As many as want to join in. Non-residents who bring their own bulbs are especially welcome.
How many Big Sur residents does it take to change a light bulb?
One who pours more oil into her lamp.
How do they change light bulbs at the Monterey Herald?
They no longer change light bulbs at the Herald. They throw out the entire lamp, tell their subscribers that they're committed to keeping everyone illuminated, and quietly hope nobody notices that everything is a little darker.
How do they change light bulbs at the Carmel Pine Cone?
They insert them with a local twist.
How do they change light bulbs at the Monterey County Weekly?
By spinning them to the left.

Reader Submissions
(The ones we could print)

From somewhere high up in the Santa Cruz Mountains Robert Cornelius sent us this gem:
How many out of town golfers does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. It takes them all day, they'll hold things up while they are doing it, lie about how many twists it took to get it in the socket, and then write the light bulb off as a business expense.
This comes from one Timothy Smith:
How many Monterey residents does it take to change a light bulb?
51. One to actually change it and 50 to apply for a grant from the Packard Foundation.

Do you have better Monterey Peninsula Light Bulb Jokes? (Probably.)
Send them to Mr. Toy.
If he likes them he'll publish them on this page and give you the credit too!

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